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1
You host a dinner party for 6 of your closest friends, you cook:
Soufflé—Show off!
Spaghetti and meatballs- Cheap and classic, just your style
Lobster mac & cheese—Decadent and pricey.
Burgers, because that's what your man requested.
2
What kind of wine drinker are you?
You feverishly swirl and sniff before you dare take a sip, except you have no idea what that actually does.
A medicinal one---when the going gets tough, pull out the corkscrew
Red, White, Pink, sparkling, who cares? As long as it’s delicious and cheap, it’s a wine worth drinking.
Unfortunately, not a frequent one...I never have anyone to share the bottle with!
3
Going out preparations include:
Googling wine terms like “barnyard” and “corked”, so you can converse with the sommelier
Convincing myself that a bar would be more entertaining than the T.V. show I just recorded..
A shot of pre-party tequila to keep wine costs down
Advil and water on your night stand because after the day you’ve had…your gettin’ drunk
4
If your past week could be named after a Destiny’s Child song, it would be:
“Bills, Bills, Bills”--- because they just keep sucking your bank account dry
”Bug a boo”—there’s been a little too many snobs on your case lately
“Survivor”—because you literally feel like you just survived hell
"Hey Ladies" --- I could really use some girl time right now
5
Wine tastes best:
When you choose it….and then your friends rave about your Vin skills
During Happy Hour—best wines for a deal
After you’ve just been dumped
With your girlfriends
6
When you’re shopping for wine, you steer clear of bottles:
If the price is more than your age
If it looks cheap—it may be tasty, but ugly bottles don’t impress anyone
That are too old---I don't want to have to finish the bottle in one night
A low alcohol percentage- what’s the point??
7
If life is a movie, your character is:
Annie Walker in Bridesmaids
Greg Focker in Meet the Parents
Carrie in Sex in the City
Simon Wilder in With Honors
8
Your life’s quote:
"It is the privilege of friendship to nonsense, and to have her nonsense respected." -Charles Lamb
“Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.” ---Anonymous
“I’m in my 30’s, I have 40,000 dollars in debt, and I live with a weirdo..”-Bridesmaids
"A man cannot make him laugh - but that's no marvel; he drinks no wine." SHAKESPEARE- Henry IV Part 2